During the holidays, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of parties, celebrations, travel, and gift giving. But people often put their own needs and mental health on the backburner, which can lead to excess stress and anxiety. Here are some tips to help you focus on and prioritize your mental health so you can have a peaceful holiday season.
1. Prioritize Your Values
What are your values? What matters to you and what truths do you hold true? Reflect on what you did this year to nurture those values. What can you do differently, the same, or add moving into the new year to grow and stay positive? What are some values and priorities that you neglected or you can do more with? Have your priorities shifted? It is natural and OK for your values and goals to shift over time.
2. Practice Gratitude
Practicing gratitude helps you appreciate what you have, which leads to a greater feeling of overall satisfaction in life. When you take the time to practice gratitude, it gives you a moment to take a deep breath, feel relief, and feel good about the abundance you have, rather than focusing on what you don’t have and want. It helps get you out of a depressive mindset and removes mental barriers so you can appreciate your life as it is.
3. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a practice that takes you out of auto-pilot and brings awareness to what you are doing. It helps you be fully present and stay in the moment. Practicing mindfulness also helps you become self-aware of your own feelings and thoughts, so you can form a deeper connection with yourself. When you practice mindfulness, just observe what is going on around you and your emotions without judgment. Focus on the here and now. It can help reduce anxiety and depression, and improve your overall mental health so you can appreciate and enjoy your life as it is.
4. Set Boundaries
It’s important to set healthy boundaries in order to prioritize your own needs and improve your mental health. During the holidays, people often put their needs aside and drop their boundaries, but it’s just as important, if not more so, to stick to your boundaries and do what’s right for you. Family members and friends might not understand your boundaries or think it’s disrespectful, but remember that your intentions are pure and you are doing the best you can. The whole point of setting healthy boundaries is to reduce stress and improve your mental health. Give yourself permission to not attend every event or even celebrate the holidays, especially if you are struggling with things such as grief and loss. You are allowed to have simple, quiet dinners within your household, see just a few select people, or only spend a couple of hours at a celebration rather than the whole day. Make a plan for the holidays ahead of time, express your needs and plans to others, and stick to it. It will help you find inner peace.
5. Don’t be a People-Pleaser
During the holidays, people often push their limits and boundaries to please others. Don’t feel pressured into doing something you aren’t comfortable with, despite what others around you want. You’ll never be able to please everyone or make everyone happy, so make yourself and your mental health the priority instead. If it’s too stressful or expensive to travel, visit family, buy lots of presents, or go to parties, you don’t have to! If others get mad or upset, remember that it’s not your fault. Again, your intentions are pure and you are doing the best you can. Take time to reflect on how you feel and what you want to do this holiday season, and don’t be a people-pleaser!
6. Don’t Overschedule
It’s easy to get caught up in the holiday frenzy, but remember to not overschedule. It can lead to excess stress and exhaustion. Figure out what you want and need and only schedule what feels right to you and that aligns with your values. Who do you want to spend your time with? What events are important to you? If you are invited to a holiday celebration that is a whole day, you don’t have to commit to staying the entire time. You can go for just a couple of hours (or less!) and make more time for yourself. You don’t owe anyone an explanation, so if you feel bad about saying no, just remember you can make time for people after the holidays and that’s OK.
7. Show Yourself Compassion
Give yourself the grace to only take on what you can handle. It’s OK to not attend every event or see everyone during the holidays. Listen to yourself and trust your gut. Show yourself love, acceptance, patience, and love. Let go of perfectionism, unrealistic expectations, and guilt. The holidays, as wonderful and full of joy as they can be, can also be coupled with guilt and social comparisons. Be true to yourself and practice self-forgiveness. Eat that extra piece of pie, let go of the guilt, and enjoy yourself. Cut yourself some slack!
8. Give Yourself a Gift
It’s easy to forget about yourself during the holidays, but you deserve to give yourself a gift. It doesn’t have to be money or something materialistic – it can be time, self-care, or something outside of the box that is special to you. Maybe carve out some time for quiet time alone, extra rest or an activity. Treat yourself!
9. Make Time for Self-Care
Keep up with your regular self-care routine, and if you don’t have one, start one. The holidays can be stressful, so if you start to feel overwhelmed or anxious, take some time to relax and regroup. Exercise, do yoga, take a bath, meditate, go for a walk, or spend time in nature. Just do something for yourself that helps you stay calm and joyful. This is a great way to practice self-compassion and find inner peace.
10. Make Time for Therapy
Keep up with your regular therapy schedule, or be open to the idea of starting therapy. You deserve to have someone listen to your needs without judgment or bias, and give you a space to fully be and express yourself. Therapy gives you a safe space to voice your concerns about issues no matter how great or small. The time spent in your session is dedicated to YOU and no one else. What a great gift to give yourself!
Improve Your Mental Health This Holiday Season
Your wellbeing and mental health don’t have to take a back seat this holiday season. Give yourself permission to prioritize your own needs and celebrate yourself! If you are struggling to find inner peace or set healthy boundaries, therapy can help. Dr. Heather Violante provides teletherapy (online video therapy) to adults living in Florida and New York, as well as all PsyPact enrolled states (listed below). Contact her online or call (754) 333-1484 to request a HIPAA compliant teletherapy session.
Offering Online Therapy in 42 States
I am a licensed psychologist in the states of Florida and New York. Additionally, I have Authority to Practice Interjurisdictional Telepsychology (APIT) from the PSYPACT Commission. I provide telehealth (online video therapy) to adults living in the 42 participating PSYPACT states listed below. For a list of current PSYPACT participating states, please visit the PSYPACT website at: https://www.psypact.org/psypactmap.
PsyPact enrolled states:
Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Colorado, Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands, Connecticut, Delaware, District of Columbia, Florida, Georgia, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Maine, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Nebraska, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Vermont, Virginia, Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming