Your Friends & Family Can’t Be Your Therapist

Your Friends & Family Can’t Be Your Therapist

Your Friends & Family Can’t Be Your Therapist

EVERYONE COULD USE THERAPY

A lot of people have this idea that therapy is only for those with depression, phobias, or severe/chronic mental health issues. I’ve heard people say, “I don’t want a therapist to tell me there’s something wrong with me,” and “I don’t need a therapist. I’m not depressed.” When I say everyone could use therapy, I am not saying that everyone has mental illness. I am saying that therapy has a lot of benefits, regardless of how severe your problems are or whether you’ve been diagnosed or not. Therapy can help improve your relationships, communication style, self-esteem, time management, and a whole lot more.

DEMYSTIFYING THERAPY

Therapy helps people be their best selves. Going to therapy doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll leave with a diagnosis. We help people not only with psychological issues, but with human issues. Your therapist won’t be wearing a white lab coat and holding a clipboard judging everything you say and do. Therapy is a relationship between two human beings, where the client decides what they want to get out of the experience. The therapist won’t make decisions for you and isn’t looking to change who you are. Think of therapy as an investment for your future. My job is to help you create your own path and goals.

STOP RELYING ON FRIENDS & FAMILY FOR ALL OF YOUR EMOTIONAL NEEDS

I’ve also seen many people who rely too heavily on their friends and family for emotional support. Yes, it’s great to have supportive people in your life, but they might not be giving you what you need. No matter how hard they try, they will always be biased (for better or worse), and their emotions and thoughts will play a part in their reactions and feedback. Therapists act as a third-party, nonjudgmental, unbiased sounding board. In therapy, you are allowed and encouraged to express your emotions fully, without fear of being judged. It is a supportive and encouraging relationship that is solely focused on your needs. You don’t have to worry that you are dumping all of your emotions on a friend or family member, that’s why therapists exist!

Therapy gives you the opportunity to say things you’ve been afraid to face. Sometimes it’s scary to be honest with other people and yourself. There is nothing that you can say in therapy that is wrong or that will shock, anger, or upset your therapist – the relationship will never change because of what you’ve said. Unlike your friends and family, you don’t have to protect a therapist when talking to them. You can be totally honest and you will never have to apologize or give an explanation for anything you’ve said or done. Therapists are trained to keep their own judgment and emotions out of the relationship. The therapist will work with what you’ve said to help you gain insight and learn more about yourself. You can say whatever you are feeling or thinking, and my job is to help you reach the goals you’ve set for yourself.

Therapy is a commitment, but unlike your other relationships, you are in total control and have every right to leave if you are uncomfortable or if it isn’t a good fit without an explanation. If you choose not to continue, therapists don’t take it personally. If you don’t go to therapy for a while and then return, the relationship will pick back up right where you left it, and no one’s feelings will be hurt. Of course your therapist, as a human being, cares about your success, but we will never push our own agendas on you. Therapy is the only relationship that’s all about you.

 

Are you ready to get on the path to being your best self? Serenity Lane Psychological Services offers therapy for a variety of issues, no matter how commonplace or trivial you might think they are. If you would like to schedule an appointment, contact Dr. Violante to learn how she can help you reach your greatest potential.